"Learning to love takes a lifetime, and it’s not for the spiritually asthmatic. I often wondered why I wasn’t ready earlier for my true love. The truth was, I needed to make God my truer love first. I thought he was, but it took years of training to help me wake up to a few crucial realities about being satisfied in Christ.
He stretched my endurance because he knew I could have the marriage I longed for only when I found my wholeness in a relationship with him." Erin Keeley Marshall
This is a truth that is often times ignored, indeed, marrying or being in a relationship just because you feel miserable alone, is not a good enough reason. Think about it, if you are not happy alone, do you think that another human being can bring in your life the happiness you dream of?
What if a desperate guy/girl would want to depend on you for his/her happiness, wouldn’t that be too much of a load for you? Even if you might not realize the pressure you’d have to live with, after a while it is suffocating and you just want a break!
That’s why, before entering a serious relationship, you need to learn to be happy on your own. If you are happy on your own, you maximize your chances of being happy in a relationship.
It is a lie to think that you cannot be content unless you are in a relationship. To be in love with the "in-love concept" is very different from being in love with a certain individual. Try to see if your motivation to be in that relationship is not only a circumstantial one like "all my friends have someone" or "I hate being alone" or any other reason except really admiring that person you want to be with.
But how can someone be happy alone?
I think we should all be grateful for the time we get to spend out of the bond of a certain relationship; this is a time you can use for discovering yourself, to truly know yourself, to identify more clearly what your desires are concerning your future mate, your purpose in life, God’s plan for your life.
A crucial part of the process is to use this time in your benefit, that is to become yourself someone that others might want to be with; this involves the polishing of your character, smoothing those areas where you tend to be sharp, learning how to deal in situations where you seem to lose control. Now that I have mentioned control, keep in mind that while it is good to know what you want and where you stand, controlling others, namely your partner, will not lead to positive long term results.
For instance, if you tend to dominate, learn how to tame your dominance by listening to the other’s opinions, really weighing what they have to say. As you might have noticed and as history has proven it over and over again, dictators have fallen head first! You surely don’t want to be a dictator…I hope; however the consequences of a dominant behavior are disastrous.
Also be realistic, there is no such a thing like the perfect man or the perfect woman, perfect for you indeed is a different thing. If there are flows that keep you away from certain potential partners, try to differentiate correctly between a noble character and a less important defect, you know, all people have them and that includes you and I.
The most important thing to realize during your time alone is that God loves you for who you are – even if He doesn’t want you to remain at the same level. God wants to give you a great love story, greater than you can ever imagine! A God that can do everything, a God Who loves you intensely and a God Who is infinitely wiser than you are, will surely work behind the scenes to give you the best partner there is for you. Ask Him! Talk to Him about it!
Some people say "well, if I let God choose my partner, He will give me the most boring/dull mate." It takes a lot of naivety to say so and this clearly shows that a person who believes like that, does not really know God.
No, God will give you the wisdom to choose the right one and that right one to choose you as well, yet God wants you to build a home together, not to destroy one another. It takes a diamond to cut a diamond, and in the process of becoming polished, God might and actually is likely to use your partner but God also knows when to put the two of you together! First He has to remove some sediments…or impurities, so that you would not hurt each other.
However, wait actively and use your time to learn to become the best version of yourself, be happy for who you are!
Saturday, October 3, 2009
How to Tell If a Woman is Interested
How can you tell if a woman is interested in you? Some commonly-heard answers include the following:
“If she tilts her head to the side and strokes her neck with the back of her fingers, then it's a sign that she's interested.”
“If she licks her lips slowly, as if longing for you, then that means she's interested.”
“If she laughs a lot and looks you in the eye, then she's really into you.”
These signs are all well and fine, but there's just one big problem. Women generally exhibit these signs of great interest maybe in one out of every 1,000 times they talk to a man. What's more, these don't say a thing about how to elicit these kinds of responses from a woman.
Suppose you walk into a bar with friends, and then you start looking for attractive women to talk to. What are the chances that you'll see one tilt their head, stroke their neck, or lick their lips in your direction? Of course. Zero. These women don't even know you yet. So do most attractive women you meet in life.
So what do most men do in this situation? They either (1) do nothing, because they're afraid they might scare her away, or (2) they do something typical, like asking her to dance or buying her a drink.
Either way, the approach almost never works. After a drink or a dance, she says thanks and goes her way. Why? Because you can't choose to make women attracted to you. Attraction isn't a choice. And if you do what every single guy before you did to her, she definitely won't feel it for you.
So here's a little tip to help you along. Mess with her.
That's right. Tease. Joke. Be difficult. Act as though you've known her for as long as you can remember. This may sound crazy, but this instantly tells her the following:
1) You aren't afraid of what she thinks of you.
2) You're fun.
3) You're unpredictable.
4) You're a wild card.
5) You're a guy who gets the picture.
You see, it's a lot simpler to tell whether or not she's interested than you think. If you engage her, and she engages you back, then that means it's on. If she bumps you in the bar and you go, “Hey, watch it, okay, I need about a foot of space here!” and she plays along and pretends to move away, then it's on.
If she laughs when you ask if there's a puppy in her oversized handbag, it's on.
If she laughs and agrees when you invite her to your table, it's on.
In a nutshell, you'll need to stop looking around for signs that women are attracted to you. Stop caring what she thinks of you. And instead of waiting for the attraction, go ahead and trigger it on your own. Remember that the signs are caused by you.
Published At: Isnare Free Articles Directory http://www.isnare.com
“If she tilts her head to the side and strokes her neck with the back of her fingers, then it's a sign that she's interested.”
“If she licks her lips slowly, as if longing for you, then that means she's interested.”
“If she laughs a lot and looks you in the eye, then she's really into you.”
These signs are all well and fine, but there's just one big problem. Women generally exhibit these signs of great interest maybe in one out of every 1,000 times they talk to a man. What's more, these don't say a thing about how to elicit these kinds of responses from a woman.
Suppose you walk into a bar with friends, and then you start looking for attractive women to talk to. What are the chances that you'll see one tilt their head, stroke their neck, or lick their lips in your direction? Of course. Zero. These women don't even know you yet. So do most attractive women you meet in life.
So what do most men do in this situation? They either (1) do nothing, because they're afraid they might scare her away, or (2) they do something typical, like asking her to dance or buying her a drink.
Either way, the approach almost never works. After a drink or a dance, she says thanks and goes her way. Why? Because you can't choose to make women attracted to you. Attraction isn't a choice. And if you do what every single guy before you did to her, she definitely won't feel it for you.
So here's a little tip to help you along. Mess with her.
That's right. Tease. Joke. Be difficult. Act as though you've known her for as long as you can remember. This may sound crazy, but this instantly tells her the following:
1) You aren't afraid of what she thinks of you.
2) You're fun.
3) You're unpredictable.
4) You're a wild card.
5) You're a guy who gets the picture.
You see, it's a lot simpler to tell whether or not she's interested than you think. If you engage her, and she engages you back, then that means it's on. If she bumps you in the bar and you go, “Hey, watch it, okay, I need about a foot of space here!” and she plays along and pretends to move away, then it's on.
If she laughs when you ask if there's a puppy in her oversized handbag, it's on.
If she laughs and agrees when you invite her to your table, it's on.
In a nutshell, you'll need to stop looking around for signs that women are attracted to you. Stop caring what she thinks of you. And instead of waiting for the attraction, go ahead and trigger it on your own. Remember that the signs are caused by you.
Published At: Isnare Free Articles Directory http://www.isnare.com
Expert Tips For Great Dating Ideas
First date ideas
1. The most important part of a first date is getting to know each other. Plan your date in a way so the environment allows for easy conversation. Don't arrange your first date where there is a noisy atmosphere such as a night club, pub or concert.
2. Arrange to meet somewhere where you are the focus. If your first date is focused on an event where there are distractions, neither of you will get the chance to assess each others true personality. Give yourself the best chance to show off your charm and wisdom.
3. When you are dating someone for the first time, make sure its during the day. A non pressured environment like a quiet park or the beach will work just fine.
Moving onto a second date.
4. So, your first date was fabulous and your already planning your next date. Now is the time to introduce some intimacy and a sexier atmosphere. The local wine bar and dinner will give any potential romance the chance to unfold.
5. Make sure when your dating someone for the second time its done at night. A romantic evening opens the door to intimacy, flirting, and all going well, a kiss at the end of the night.
Perfect second date: Friday night after a long week at work will ensure you both look forward to each others company after hitting it off on your first date. Start to open up to each other with cocktails and conversation on the terrace of bar or restaurant over looking the city skyline or beach. Perhaps move on to a Jazz bar, or go dancing at a busy club then move off the dance floor and get cozy in a quiet corner of the club.
If you like this person enough to be seen together as a couple, take them somewhere that's well thought out and informal. Find out what they love to do and treat them to a surprise. Send her flowers at work, offer to cook him his favourite meal, at his house.
Dating someone and discovering there is real chemistry is one of the best feelings anyone can experience. Whilst the singles scene is great fun for a while, nothing beats becoming part of a new and exciting romantic relationship.
If you are stuck for ideas on where to meet other great singles and have not tried online dating, you are truly missing out on what is now the most popular means of matchmaking in the world. Everyday, thousands of singles are connecting through online dating sites. Avoid bad first dates and get to know someone through online dating before meeting in person and remove all the guess work.
All the latest in singles online dating news and articles Online dating singles chat rooms All about having fun online and meeting new people.
Free online dating sites Australia
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Matt_D_Fuller
1. The most important part of a first date is getting to know each other. Plan your date in a way so the environment allows for easy conversation. Don't arrange your first date where there is a noisy atmosphere such as a night club, pub or concert.
2. Arrange to meet somewhere where you are the focus. If your first date is focused on an event where there are distractions, neither of you will get the chance to assess each others true personality. Give yourself the best chance to show off your charm and wisdom.
3. When you are dating someone for the first time, make sure its during the day. A non pressured environment like a quiet park or the beach will work just fine.
Moving onto a second date.
4. So, your first date was fabulous and your already planning your next date. Now is the time to introduce some intimacy and a sexier atmosphere. The local wine bar and dinner will give any potential romance the chance to unfold.
5. Make sure when your dating someone for the second time its done at night. A romantic evening opens the door to intimacy, flirting, and all going well, a kiss at the end of the night.
Perfect second date: Friday night after a long week at work will ensure you both look forward to each others company after hitting it off on your first date. Start to open up to each other with cocktails and conversation on the terrace of bar or restaurant over looking the city skyline or beach. Perhaps move on to a Jazz bar, or go dancing at a busy club then move off the dance floor and get cozy in a quiet corner of the club.
If you like this person enough to be seen together as a couple, take them somewhere that's well thought out and informal. Find out what they love to do and treat them to a surprise. Send her flowers at work, offer to cook him his favourite meal, at his house.
Dating someone and discovering there is real chemistry is one of the best feelings anyone can experience. Whilst the singles scene is great fun for a while, nothing beats becoming part of a new and exciting romantic relationship.
If you are stuck for ideas on where to meet other great singles and have not tried online dating, you are truly missing out on what is now the most popular means of matchmaking in the world. Everyday, thousands of singles are connecting through online dating sites. Avoid bad first dates and get to know someone through online dating before meeting in person and remove all the guess work.
All the latest in singles online dating news and articles Online dating singles chat rooms All about having fun online and meeting new people.
Free online dating sites Australia
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Matt_D_Fuller
Modern Dating
Once upon a time long...long ago a young man would meet with the father of his prospective date on the front porch of her home. He'd ask the father's permission for the pleasure of her company each evening before taking her out. When, where and an appropriate return time, was discussed at length and agreed upon. No, let me rephrase that statement.
The father would instruct the boy about his expectations and requirements. There was no discussion. The dates then where usually innocent enough. They were surrounded by a sodas, burgers, fries and or maybe just a shake at the local juke shop. These outings might be followed by a movie with the return home of the youthful flower to her respective abode.
The couple might have been spent talking of school and the coming summer vacation on the front porch while under watchful eyes, threw strategically cracked drapes. As then, and perhaps even now, the date ended with the rhythmic flicking of the porch light that signaled a parental conclusion. A quick, innocent peck placed on the cheek of the responsible lad was followed by a hasty retreat of the young lady.
O.K. I probably went way too far back for some of you. But no doubt, you have seen this in a black and white movie or heard tale of it from an elder family member. Either way, modern dating has undergone tremendous change since your parents' day--for that matter, your grandparents' courting years.
The 60's ushered in the sexual revolution, the pill, and-FREE LOVE. Since the aprons came off and women were not tied to having children the traditional date hasn't been the same. Saving one's virtue for their honeymoon faded away, now relegated to movies and fairy tails.
Let's face it. The best thing parents can do is educate their children and pray for the best. We've been made painfully aware that modern teens seldom graduate from their high school with an intact virtue. Today young people, joined by a growing number of adults, turn to the internet in hope of finding romance and meeting Mr. or Ms Right.
Services range from free and often suspicious to hundreds, even thousands of dollars in service fees. Prior to the advent of the internet, people met, talked and discovered what brought them together or set them apart as individuals. Now services have you post pictures, create personal bio's and specify preferences such as eye color, weight, height, economic status, even which race you wish to engage socially. Introductions are initiated via e-mail, a "flirt", or a series of one liner comment methods.
With all of the technology at one's disposal you'd think dating would be that much less complicated. The answer: "WRONG!" Not only do dangers exist in the form of internet predators but scammers, both male and female, look for easy marks in the lonely hearts club.
Their interest is to separate the unsuspecting from their purse or bank account. They create profiles that contain quality pictures , but little about themselves. They will claim to be local but soon write of some personal tragedy involving Nigeria or other in Africa or Russia. They are professional cons whose sole objective is to take your hard earned paycheck, life savings and threaten you...
The following is a composition of do and don'ts list comprised out of recent trends in the internet dating world. We are very far from the days of sipping soda and parental guidance.. The list below is meant as a source guide to the dating community . After suffering my own failures, due to little knowledge of the internet dating jungle, I urge you to read it and arm yourself. Your search will be more successful and you'll be armed with information that can help you avoid financial and sexual predators.
1.) You should never release personal banking information, SSN# or any type of financial information to an individual over the phone, internet or through another person who may coerce you to do so. For any pay services on the internet you will be asked for credit card or debit card information at a purchase. However, do insure that the site is secure and is well established and reputable. Check the Better Business Bureau, Consumer Affairs and internet reviews of the site you're choosing. Never give out your bank routing number or your bank account number for pay sites. If you want to verify a site and protect yourself against fraudulent charges set up an account through Pay Pal. At the end of this article there is a list of free sites as well as pay sites to which you can subscribe for internet meet-ups.
2.) Never schedule to meet anyone, regardless of their phone demeanor, for the first few times in a place that is not public where there are other people around. A person can sound nice over the phone and be charming but you have no defense against a predator when you are alone and there's no back-up. Insist upon this and do not compromise, especially women. Men, being male does not mean that you are safe.
3.) If a person focuses on sex either in jest or more seriously simply hang up! Also use phone numbers that have a block service. Usually cells are best as home numbers are easily traced to home addresses.
4.) Be honest in your profile and straight forward about who you are as a person and what you're looking for. If you make as far as meeting a person you'll be found out. Besides, you're wasting your time as well as the other persons if you're deceptive. It leads to heart break. Be original in your profile and thorough about yourself.
5.) Also be original in your profile and thorough about yourself and what you're looking for in addition to explaining what you're looking for.
6.) Stay away from negative subjects on the net and in person. You're attempting to attract Mr. or Ms Right. You don't want to scare them off before you have a chance to find out about them.
7.) If a service offers background checks you may opt for this but do it early before you invest yourself and your time. Heartbreak can be overcome in time, but the monetary expense of serious dating drains your coffer and limits your prospects to move on.
8.) This may sound out of the norm but pay attention to how the person speaks and uses grammar. What idioms do they use? This is a quick way to find out if you are compatible intellectually and a gage for honesty.
9.) As hard as it can be, allow plenty of opportunity for them to talk as much as possible. Do not dominate the conversation. The best way to get to know a person is listen not talk. You'll be able to determine a lot more about them, their if you are silent and attentive.
10.) Lastly, read steps 1-9 and do your research on internet dating as well as into the person you choose to spend your time with.
Free Sites: Ok Cupid, MySpace, Plentyoffish, Tagged
Pay Sites: EHarmony, Match.com
James (TEX) Alvarado is a Freelance writor and offers custom SEO friendly articles, web fillers and adds working out of the Dallas,Texas area. Check out his web site at http://furioncreations.com/
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com
The father would instruct the boy about his expectations and requirements. There was no discussion. The dates then where usually innocent enough. They were surrounded by a sodas, burgers, fries and or maybe just a shake at the local juke shop. These outings might be followed by a movie with the return home of the youthful flower to her respective abode.
The couple might have been spent talking of school and the coming summer vacation on the front porch while under watchful eyes, threw strategically cracked drapes. As then, and perhaps even now, the date ended with the rhythmic flicking of the porch light that signaled a parental conclusion. A quick, innocent peck placed on the cheek of the responsible lad was followed by a hasty retreat of the young lady.
O.K. I probably went way too far back for some of you. But no doubt, you have seen this in a black and white movie or heard tale of it from an elder family member. Either way, modern dating has undergone tremendous change since your parents' day--for that matter, your grandparents' courting years.
The 60's ushered in the sexual revolution, the pill, and-FREE LOVE. Since the aprons came off and women were not tied to having children the traditional date hasn't been the same. Saving one's virtue for their honeymoon faded away, now relegated to movies and fairy tails.
Let's face it. The best thing parents can do is educate their children and pray for the best. We've been made painfully aware that modern teens seldom graduate from their high school with an intact virtue. Today young people, joined by a growing number of adults, turn to the internet in hope of finding romance and meeting Mr. or Ms Right.
Services range from free and often suspicious to hundreds, even thousands of dollars in service fees. Prior to the advent of the internet, people met, talked and discovered what brought them together or set them apart as individuals. Now services have you post pictures, create personal bio's and specify preferences such as eye color, weight, height, economic status, even which race you wish to engage socially. Introductions are initiated via e-mail, a "flirt", or a series of one liner comment methods.
With all of the technology at one's disposal you'd think dating would be that much less complicated. The answer: "WRONG!" Not only do dangers exist in the form of internet predators but scammers, both male and female, look for easy marks in the lonely hearts club.
Their interest is to separate the unsuspecting from their purse or bank account. They create profiles that contain quality pictures , but little about themselves. They will claim to be local but soon write of some personal tragedy involving Nigeria or other in Africa or Russia. They are professional cons whose sole objective is to take your hard earned paycheck, life savings and threaten you...
The following is a composition of do and don'ts list comprised out of recent trends in the internet dating world. We are very far from the days of sipping soda and parental guidance.. The list below is meant as a source guide to the dating community . After suffering my own failures, due to little knowledge of the internet dating jungle, I urge you to read it and arm yourself. Your search will be more successful and you'll be armed with information that can help you avoid financial and sexual predators.
1.) You should never release personal banking information, SSN# or any type of financial information to an individual over the phone, internet or through another person who may coerce you to do so. For any pay services on the internet you will be asked for credit card or debit card information at a purchase. However, do insure that the site is secure and is well established and reputable. Check the Better Business Bureau, Consumer Affairs and internet reviews of the site you're choosing. Never give out your bank routing number or your bank account number for pay sites. If you want to verify a site and protect yourself against fraudulent charges set up an account through Pay Pal. At the end of this article there is a list of free sites as well as pay sites to which you can subscribe for internet meet-ups.
2.) Never schedule to meet anyone, regardless of their phone demeanor, for the first few times in a place that is not public where there are other people around. A person can sound nice over the phone and be charming but you have no defense against a predator when you are alone and there's no back-up. Insist upon this and do not compromise, especially women. Men, being male does not mean that you are safe.
3.) If a person focuses on sex either in jest or more seriously simply hang up! Also use phone numbers that have a block service. Usually cells are best as home numbers are easily traced to home addresses.
4.) Be honest in your profile and straight forward about who you are as a person and what you're looking for. If you make as far as meeting a person you'll be found out. Besides, you're wasting your time as well as the other persons if you're deceptive. It leads to heart break. Be original in your profile and thorough about yourself.
5.) Also be original in your profile and thorough about yourself and what you're looking for in addition to explaining what you're looking for.
6.) Stay away from negative subjects on the net and in person. You're attempting to attract Mr. or Ms Right. You don't want to scare them off before you have a chance to find out about them.
7.) If a service offers background checks you may opt for this but do it early before you invest yourself and your time. Heartbreak can be overcome in time, but the monetary expense of serious dating drains your coffer and limits your prospects to move on.
8.) This may sound out of the norm but pay attention to how the person speaks and uses grammar. What idioms do they use? This is a quick way to find out if you are compatible intellectually and a gage for honesty.
9.) As hard as it can be, allow plenty of opportunity for them to talk as much as possible. Do not dominate the conversation. The best way to get to know a person is listen not talk. You'll be able to determine a lot more about them, their if you are silent and attentive.
10.) Lastly, read steps 1-9 and do your research on internet dating as well as into the person you choose to spend your time with.
Free Sites: Ok Cupid, MySpace, Plentyoffish, Tagged
Pay Sites: EHarmony, Match.com
James (TEX) Alvarado is a Freelance writor and offers custom SEO friendly articles, web fillers and adds working out of the Dallas,Texas area. Check out his web site at http://furioncreations.com/
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com
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